The Unknown

 

 

Linda picked some of our sunflowers and set them up in her little vase that greets anyone entering our back door.  I kinda looks like a Dr. Suess scene of happy little flowers singing a song of joy.  

Everybody has their hot buttons and other environmental influences that from time to time can cause distress.   One of my worst causes of stress is being unsure and not knowing what sort of outcome is expected in a certain situation.    I had exhibited this behavior since high school.  For example, when I was in athletics, before each meet or game I was a total wreck in the locker room or just prior to the races because the race or games were up for grabs. Would I be able to perform or just stink the joint up? Self doubt was ridiculous.    I would go the bathroom 5 times in 30 minutes and of course nothing happened of any consequence, but I would get that wound up over competition.  I am getting better now, but not much.

I have been wearing a Nike wrist band for a couple of months that measures the amount of activity or movement over time and calculates some number that represents your  fuel burn.   I call mine, the Tattle Tail, because it lets you know if you are moving or burning any energy.  Last week, during air travel  from Nashville to Spokane , Idaho it was useful  for defining my level of Unknown.    The plane leaving Nashville, was broken and we would have to make new connections ( unknown) to get to Spokane much later than planned.   After getting to Salt Lake City,  that plane was broken as well ( just enough to get me aggravated about this unknown).  2 out of 3 legs had bad planes--Delta does this regularly to me.  I finally made it, 8 hours later than planned and not in the best of humor.  I do not like this sort of failure and Delta had quite a string of failures for me on their regional jets.    Regional Junks would be a better moniker.    I looked at my fuel burn for that day and it was pretty high for someone that sat a lot or walked most of the day.   I could have done a hard workout and not burned that much fuel !!   I was quite stunned at the amount of energy burned and it all relates to the unknown...  I am still not of fan of not knowing and I really do not see this improving much for planes, airports and rental cars.    I am getting better for meets, I have cut down from 5 times in the bathroom to 2 or 3, but at my age there are now legitimate reasons.  I still get pretty ramped up worrying about having a good performance, but that is my wiring and it is not going to change.  Can I win it or do my best??  that is a big unknown that every athlete always struggles.  

I am still doing some of the distance running and have started to do a little weight work.   Linda is working on some strength related activities and I jump in and do some reps.    Last week I was in Idaho and ran on a little high school track with a great view.  The Clearwater River valley was clear, warm and without any real humidity.   Great day to run some 600's.   Work went pretty good as well.